You’ve heard of the concept “fake it till you make it.” Let’s take that idea one step further. Let’s talk about how to create it and become it – actively shaping your future self with today’s actions.
“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” ~ George Bernard Shaw
“The best way to predict your future is to envision it. Now create it.” ~ Kevin Harrington
“What you think you create, what you feel you attract, what you imagine you become.” ~ Unknown
Create It and Become It!
The trouble with “fake it till you make it” is that it feels inauthentic — and no one wants to be a phony! Think about it – would you rather pretend to be a strong, smart, confident person … or be a strong, smart, confident person?
That’s where the idea of “create it and become it” comes into play. It’s not about pretending to be a leader, a thinker, an expert; it’s about taking action to become that person, through your body language, experience, and expertise.
Crush Imposter Syndrome
Imposter syndrome describes people who despite their talents, capability and high achievements, live in fear of being “found out” or exposed as frauds. It’s that fear at the back of your mind that says, “Why would anyone listen to me? What if they knew the real me? They’re going to find out I’m a fraud.”
You might be surprised how common this fear is. I read a New York Times article describing presidents who, the first time they found themselves alone in the Oval Office, thought, “I hope nobody finds out I’m in here.” Feeling like an imposter can be a huge obstacle to becoming the successful leader, expert, or person you want to be.
So how do you overcome it? Start by building awareness. Notice when self-doubts arise and switch them to positive and supportive affirmations, such as, “I’ve faced a similar challenge and succeeded, and I can do it again.” Or simply, “I know my stuff!”
Focus on the value you provide and stop comparing yourself to others. Visualizing your success, keeping your eye on the outcome, will help you stay calm and focused.
Adopt a Power Pose
In her TED Talk, “Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are,” social psychologist Amy Cuddy says, “When you pretend to be powerful, you are more likely to actually feel powerful.” She suggests adjusting your body language to not only change how others perceive you, but to change how you think about you! Before going into a stressful situation, take two minutes in private to “stand like a superhero” – chest out, legs hip width apart, hands on hips. Cuddy’s research shows this causes hormonal changes in your body chemistry that make you feel more confident. In turn, others will sense your feeling of being in command of yourself and the situation.
The idea isn’t to use “power posing” to intimidate others; it’s to “bring your full, spirited self to the situation, stripped of the fears and inhibitions that might typically hold you back.” Use your body language to convey power and trustworthiness.
Act on Hope, Not on Fear
When working to become a better version of yourself, push yourself to take action based on your hopes and aspirations, not your fears. When inspired by hope, you’ll overcome your fears and push yourself towards the vision of a stronger, more successful you. The opportunity for improvement is endless!
Tips to Create It & Become It
- Frame a challenge as an opportunity. Rather than feeling scared or daunted by the challenge at hand, view it as an opportunity do something new and different.
- Observe role models. Observe how others around you lead, influence others, use humor, and come across as self-assured. Seek ways to incorporate their successful tactics and behaviors into your repertoire.
- Create and repeat affirmations. Negative thoughts can weigh you down and be self-fulfilling. Consciously do the opposite. Use affirmations, which are positive self-statements to help you visualize, believe in, and achieve what you want.
- Learn from your mistakes. Failure reinforces feelings of imposter syndrome. Remember, mistakes are part of learning and necessary for growth.
Instead of drowning in self-doubt, focus on the takeaways. After a setback, ask yourself how you can improve based on what you’ve learned.
- Set an expectation for growth, not perfection. When working to become a better version of yourself, don’t set an impossibly high bar for success. Instead, focus on achievable goals and realistic growth.
Focus on the Future
Our Leap Forward Coaching our process will help you create and become your best self. Our thoughtful methods teach you to cultivate the confidence and create the actions that will shape you into the powerful and successful person you want to be.
© 2017, Leap Forward Coaching